I had split personalities, three in total, one I just met, another who helped me succeed in business and a third that was holding me back. My “Warrior” had to go. She had served me well for over twenty-five years; she had become my partner, companion and knight in shining armor. She helped me manage life’s complications and succeed when the odds were against me. She helped me survive when the challenges of life became equal or greater to the responsibilities I carried. She steeled me for what I HAD to do and protected me when my emotions were getting in the way of my progress. I could never have become the woman I am today without her help, but lately she had over stayed her welcome.
To be honest until recently I didn’t even know she existed, I mean why would I? She had been a part of me for most of my adult life but it wasn’t until I was introduced to my “Feminine Self” that her presence became brutally apparent. You see somewhere along the way I had lost my “Feminine Self” the part of me that shared compassion, empathy and love.
The woman inside me, who trusted her intuition, listened with her soul and whose path in life was guided by the beatings of her heart. I realized my female self was never really encouraged, in fact as a young woman with a strong father and a career in athletics her strengths weren’t exactly appreciated. Even as a working mother, divorcee and sole provider of three young kids I was so busy there really wasn’t time to nurture her needs and building a career as a female financial advisor in a world created for men her attributes were often shunned and discouraged. She just got lost in the shuffle.
My “Warrior” kept butting in!
BUT today my life is different, my children are raised, I have a successful business and a loving and supportive husband. I now have the time to get re-introduced to my “Feminine Self” but each time I try my “Warrior” kept butting her head in, taking charge, exerting control, forcing her presence which only created internal conflict and less than satisfying relationships both personally and professionally.
Determined to get to know this softer woman inside me I forged ahead. As I continued to search for that “Feminine Self” I began to see a different woman emerge. I found myself less stressed and more aware of my purpose and intentions. I became softer, listened more and stopped trying to fix everyone and everything; allowing others to evolve and change at their own pace. But then when even the slightest challenges presented themselves my “Warrior” would jump right back in and dominate and I could immediately feel myself become stiff, hardened, ready for battle, but what was there to battle?
I didn’t even like myself when she was with me, that was when I realized it was time for my “Warrior” to go. I wrote her a “Dear Joan” letter. I told her what an asset she had been in my life, how much I appreciated her strength and all the times she had protected me.
I wanted her to know how important she was in my life and how she helped me become the woman I am today but that her skills were no longer needed or welcome. Saying goodbye was difficult but it was time and the experience was totally freeing. The moment I wrote my letter I immediately felt lighter, less encumbered. The feelings of love, no longer weighed down by armor began to inhale, filling my body with a sense of euphoria. I laughed more, smiled more and felt closer to family, friends and God. By reviving my “Feminine Self” and releasing the “Warrior” within me I began to see a positive impact on EVERY aspect of my life.
I know I am not alone, most women in business, especially those in a more male oriented industry have their own “Warrior”. There have been times when we all needed our “Warrior” to step in and help us traverse the potential roadblocks and barriers that life drops in our path but there comes a time in every woman’s life where her “Warrior” is no longer an asset but her number one deterrent to both personal and professional growth.
There is a stronger more powerful woman inside all of us, a woman veiled in warmth and beauty that is ready to come out and take you to a new place of growth love and life. That “Feminine Woman” inside of you will become your greatest source of the passion and purpose you once thought lost and a constant supply of radiant energy inspiring you in every aspect of your life. Perhaps it’s your time to say goodbye to your “Warrior”?
If you like this message and are ready to grow, on your own terms, check out our femXadvisor Coaching programs.